That jolt again

Tap touch tap
Touch touch touch tap
I laid down my words
My thoughts
My heartbeats
One after
The other

What do I know but that I have to

I have to bleed on the page
I have to show my keyed-in cleavage

Rhetorical passive-aggressive
I’m all out here
Wanting needing eyes and minds to give

And I’m here in earnest
I’m sincerely in this
I need someone to listen
To take note
Of how many times I say I want to let go


I write it down here

And once I met someone fierce
And soft
And brilliant, hard, guarded
And lost
And I couldn’t turn away even
My eyes were glued to the screen
I felt like he could see me

And sometimes he still does
From a distance
I know when he visits
Because I feel his heat
Even though I made it more real than i will ever admit

I stop in my tracks
Waiting for thunder
The lightning

Open wounds I sit here licking
I won’t pretend
I don’t miss him
Every single minute






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